A post from: funny quotes and sayings

sheldon cooper quotes the big bang theory

You kniow what they say. Revenge is a dish best served nude ! – Sheldon Cooper

They were threatened by my intelligence and too stupid to know that’s why they hated me.- Jim Parsons AKA Dr. Sheldon Cooper

I don’t say anything. I merely offer you a facial expression taht suggests you have gone insane. – Jim Parsons AKA Dr. Sheldon Cooper

I can’t be impossible – I exist ! believe what you mean to say is – ‘I give up, he is improbable’.- Jim Parsons AKA Dr. Sheldon Cooper

I don’t need sleep, i need answers. I need to determine where, in this swamp of unbalanced formulas, squatteth the toad of truth.- Jim Parsons AKA Dr. Sheldon Cooper

You have to check your messages. The leaving of a message is one half of a social construct, which is completed by the checking of the message. If that contract breaks down, then all social contract break down, and we descent into anarchy.- Jim Parsons AKA Dr. Sheldon Cooper

Interesting. Sex works even better than chocolate to modify behavior. I wonder if anyone else has stumbled onto this ?- Jim Parsons AKA Dr. Sheldon Cooper

My existence is a continuum, so I have been what I am at each point in the implied time period.- Jim Parsons AKA Dr. Sheldon Cooper

If outside is so good, why has mankind spent thousands of years trying to perfect inside ? – Jim Parsons AKA Dr. Sheldon Cooper

I am quite aware of the way humans usually reproduce, which is messy, unsanitary and involves loud and unnecessary appeals to a deity. – Jim Parsons AKA Dr. Sheldon Cooper

Howard: Now, I downloaded an app that might be helpful in this situation.
[whip cracks]
Sheldon: You’re right. I’m smart as a whip. I should be able to figure this out.

But then some poor woman is going to pin her hopes on my sperm, what if she winds up with a toddler that doesn’t know if he should use an integral or a differential to solve for the area under a curve? – Jim Parsons AKA Dr. Sheldon Cooper

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A post from: funny quotes and sayings