A post from: funny quotes and sayings

Keep yourself updated with more funny quotes and sayings ……

A post from: funny quotes and sayings

A post from: funny quotes and sayings

* Try not to become a man of success but a man of value

* The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams

* A man who views the world the same at fifty as he did at twenty has wasted thirty years of his life.

* Age is whatever you think it is. You are as old as you think you are.

* Hating people because of their color is wrong. And it doesn’t matter which color does the hating. It’s just plain wrong.

* He who is not courageous enough to take risks will accomplish nothing in life.

* Life is a gamble. You can get hurt, but people die in plane crashes, lose their arms and legs in car accidents; people die every day. Same with fighters: some die, some get hurt, some go on. You just don’t let yourself believe it will happen to you.

* Only a man who knows what it is like to be defeated can reach down to the bottom of his soul and come up with the extra ounce of power it takes to win when the match is even.

* Belief is the death of intelligence. As soon as one believes a doctrine of any sort, or assumes certitude, one stops thinking about that aspect of existence.

* It only takes 20 years for a liberal to become a conservative without changing a single idea.

* What lies behind us and what lies before us are small matters compared to what lies within us..

* The Bible tells us to be like God, and then on page after page it describes God as a mass murderer. This may be the single most important key to the political behavior of Western Civilization.

* Intelligence is the capacity to receive, decode and transmit information efficiently. Stupidity is blockage of this process at any point. Bigotry, ideologies etc. block the ability to receive; robotic reality-tunnels block the ability to decode or integrate new signals; censorship blocks transmission.

* I think I got off on the wrong planet. Beam me up Scotty, there’s no rational life here.

* You must be the change you wish to see in the world

* You can do anything, but not everything. —David Allen

* We are all here for some special reason. Stop being a prisoner of your past. Become the architect of your future.

I hope you’ve enjoyed best of funny life quotes to live by … Please keep coming back for more updates on best funny quotes to live by .. I will be updating this post time to time…

A post from: funny quotes and sayings

A post from: funny quotes and sayings

When a girl is in love, You can see it in her smile .. When a guy is in love, you can see it in his eyes…

Don’t try to understand a girl completely. If you do, then either you will go mad… or you will start loving her..

Nobody believes that M single…WTF… i mean to say “WOW THAT FANTASTIC” !!

The brain is the most outstanding organ it works 24 hours a day 365 days a year from birth until you fall in love.

Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. That’s relativity

I am not a perfect person, I make alot of mistakes… but still, I love those people who stay with me after knowing how I really am.

When a boy calls you cute he likes your face. When he call you hot he likes your body. When he calls you beautiful he likes your heart.

OK, I admit.. We do have something in common; We both LOVE me !” By Garfield(the cat)

Friendship… is not something you learn in school. But if you haven’t learned the meaning of friendship, you really haven’t learned anything.

Love is shown in your deeds,  not in your words.

Everyone is gifted. Some open the package sooner.

Men are like bank accounts, without a log money they don’t generate a lot of interest.

You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you.

Do you belive in love at first sight or should i walk by again ?

My life without you would be like a broken pencil, pointless.

I love my computer because my friends live in it.

I worry about my nan. If she’s alone and she falls, does she make a noise. I’m joking she’s dead.

The funny thing is, nobody ever really knows how much anybody else is hurting. We could be standing next to someone who is completely broken and we wouldn’t even notic it.

Follow your heart’s love, your life’s happiness will follow you.

True love stories never have a happy ending cauuse love never ends.

Roses are red violets are Blue, Love never crossed my mind until the day i met you

Our eyes are placed infront because it is more important to look ahead than to look back

People Say you can’t live without love…. I think Oxygen is more important.

I love you with all my butt, I would say heart, but my butt is bigger.

NEver get jealous when you see your ex with someone else, because our parents taught us to give our used toys to the less fortunate ones.

Okay mind, i count to 3 and you erase him. 1,2 …. Ahhhh, let’s try again !

IF you love something let it go, If it comes back to you it’s your, If it doesn’t, it never was.

THe awkward moment when you are about to hug someone sexy as hell and then you hit the mirror.

Girls are like POkeman, you need balls to catch em..

Kiss my neck, bit me, pull my hair, trace my spine, hold me down, use your tongue, make me moan, Don’t stop till i am shaking.

Love is like a hurricane, you don’t know what is in for gain.

When you feel that nobody loves, you nobody cares for you. Everyone is ignoring you, and people are jealous of you. You should really ask yourself… Am i Too sexy ?

You don’t love a woman because she is beautiful, but she is beautiful because you love her.

Please keep a lookout for more famous funny quotes on love on this blog post….

A post from: funny quotes and sayings

A post from: funny quotes and sayings

1. You cannot make Omlets without breaking the eggs.
2. Come to my parlour said the spider to the fly
3. A dog kennel is no place to hide a sausage
4. You can never unscramble eggs.
5. Fattest pigs go to the butcher first.
6. All that comes from a cow is not milk.
7. This shot was as sweet as tooti frooti!
8. Great feathers make great birds!
9. My idea of a bird is 36-24-36.
10. As innocent as freshly laid eggs.
11. A good lather is half the shave
12. As uncomfortable as a bum on a porcupine.
13. A girl born beautiful is half married
14. There is always free cheese in a mousetrap
15. Nobody travels on the road to success without a puncture or two.
16. The cat with gloves catches no mice.
17. Experience is like a comb that life gives you when you are bald.
18. Statistics are like miniskirts, they reveal more than what they hide.
19. You got to choose between tightening your belt or losing your pants.
20. You may have a heart of gold, but so does a hard-boiled egg.
21. He is like a one-legged man in a bum kicking competition.
22. It is very difficult to kill a man who is hell bent on committing suicide!
23. When you are dining with the demons, you’ve got to have a long spoon!
24. All that comes from a cow is not milk!
25. Just because a rose smells sweet, you do not use it in the soup!
26. Humility is like an underwear. You have to wear it but should not show it
27. If “ifs and buts” were “pots and pans”, there would be no tinkers
28. Gamblers they Are like Toilets BROKE one Day Flush The Next

A post from: funny quotes and sayings

A post from: funny quotes and sayings

- Sex and alcohol, it fuels the desire but kills the performance…!!!

- Trust is like a paper once it’s crumpled it can’t be perfect again…

- You never realize what you have till its gone ..Toilet paper is a good example.

- People are made to be loved and things are made to be used. The confusion comes when people are used and things are loved.

- At any given moment you have the power to say this is not how the story is going to end.

- If you live your life fully, you will die only once. But if you are scared of every step, fear will kill you day after day. – Paulo coetho.

quotes about life

- ”Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.”- Buddha

- When people ask dumb questions, I feel obligated to give sarcastic answers.

- A Jealous woman does better investigation than the FBI

- Give a man a gun, and he can rob a bank. Give a man a bank, and he can rob the world.

- Be happy infront of people who don’t like you, it kills them

- I once had a life… THen some idiot came and told me to make a FACEBOOK account !!

- Don’t take me for granted, because unlike others, I am not afraid to walk away.

- I come up with the best ideas when sitting on the toilet then forget them after the flush.

- You don’t need to attend every argument you are invited to.

- When I was young I thought that money was the most important thing in life; now that I am getting old … … … … … … …. … … … … … … … … … …… … … … … … …. … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … …. … …… … … … … … …. … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … …. … …… … … … … … …. … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … …. … …I know that it is.

- “Power corrupts. Knowledge is power. Study hard. Be evil.”

- Don’t drink and drive, you might hit a bump and spill your drink.

- ”Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same.”

- “It does not matter how slowly you go so long as you do not stop.”

- Criticizing is easy, art is difficult

- You can pick your own nose, but u cant pick yours friends nose

- I found life’s answers in my room; The fan said be cool. The roof said aim high. The window said see the world. The clock said every minute is precious. The mirror said reflect before you act. The calender said be up to date. The door said push hard for your goals & the carpet said kneel down and pray..

- We stopped checking for monsters under our bed because we realized they were within us.

Keep look out for more updates on funny quotes on life via thefunnyquotessayings.com

A post from: funny quotes and sayings